I think it's safe to say (I have witnesses) that I've had a fairly melancholy weekend. Oh "melancholy"...that is such a deceiving word to me. It sounds fabulous, but it's not. Being sad or down-trodden is no fun, in and of itself, but then not exactly knowing why you are makes it even worse.
I guess if I was completely honest with myself I'd probably attribute it to the fact that I just take too many things on. There is a fine line between favors that build your character and favors that demean your sanity. The difference is quantity vs. quality. How can I ever expect to adequately serve someone if I'm rushing from one thing to another? Real service is giving time, not giving a loaf of bread and rushing out the door to attend to your next "noble deed."
Quality over quantity! ...wow! I really needed that reminder.
You know that song "I'm Just a Girl Who Can't Say No" from Oklahoma? Yeah, that's me! Not in terms of "handsome fellers" persay, but in terms of giving favors and volunteering. Everyday is a new search for balance. So, I figure it's probably a good idea to get my "volunteer capacity gauge" figured out before my life gets any crazier... I mean, I like to hope that it won't ever be more crazy than it is now, but if it's consistent with the past, then each new life lesson will be exponentially more crazy than the last. What's really important is my attitude toward life's lessons:
Is being stranded in a river stocked with hungry crocodiles a trial?
Or is it an adventure?
As my friend Bryce always says, "Well...it'd make a good story!"
Attitude determines altitude. What we take from our life's grand adventures, the ones we often call "trials," is up to us. We can't pick and choose which trials we'd like to have and which ones we'd rather sneak around quietly, undetected... It's like that bear hunt song you sang in kindergarden:
"...Can't go over it. Can't go under it. Can't go around it. Gotta go through it."
It's not easy, but gratefully, we are blessed with those moments when at last we reach the summit of a mountainous trial, we rest on a tree stump and happily take in the progress we've made and the beautiful view before us... A view we couldn't have seen if we had just given up at the trail (trial) head.
So, I guess what I'm getting at is this:
Life can change in an instant, but that's no reason to lock yourself in your bedroom and avoid change when it comes knocking. How boring would that be? Are you the same person you were 10 years ago? If yes, well then my friend, you've got some exciting catching up to do. If no, then congratulations ...you've CHANGED! That's good. In fact, it's normal. Change is constant. The trail isn't always going to lead the same way it did yesterday. Uncertainty can be scary or exciting. Happily, it's your choice which turn you take at the next fork in the road. And even more happily, you don't have to make that decision on your own.
That's why I love Sunday. It's a reminder that I'm not alone and that, thank HEAVENS, I don't have to rely on my own ridiculous problem solving skills to get me through the next bend in the road. My Savior has been to the summit before and he knows the way. He is The Way. I love knowing that.
Happy day. All is well.